The Mean Man

We took in a rescue furbaby (German Shepherd female dog) 13 months ago. We got her from a foster mom who works with a canine rescue agency. She had been rescued from an Amish puppy mill in Indiana. Amish puppy mills are historically known for their deplorable practices and conditions. Kelly had been with the foster for just a month when she was okayed for adoption—she was social with people (though timid), not aggressive, good with kids and other pets, etc. When we got her, she was all of that—and more.

What Kelly brought to us was a smart and good dog who has a great heart and an eagerness to learn and please. She also brought with her a boatload of psychological scaring, courtesy of The Mean Man, the breeder who owned the puppy mill. Thirteen months into our family, and she is still very leery of the male of the house (me) and she finds it very hard to accept love in any form. The time with her thus far has been difficult for both of us. Her, in growing into the mind-set that I am not The Mean Man, and me in having the patience to continue to heap love and care on her as she grows through the residual damage in her mind that was heaped upon her by that Mean Man.

Folks, we all have some residue in our psyche’s that was left behind by The Mean Man, my metaphor today for those in the past who have hurt us, and possibly scarred us deeply, either willingly or inadvertently. None of us is immune. And, like Kelly, we have all or must still have, a need to accept that we have some brokenness, and work through that scarring in order to be all that we can be, all that God intended us to be. Further, we should recognize that our scarring isn’t all bad. It’s good in the sense that from it we grow.

Also, we must forgive those who were The Mean Man in our lives. Not for them, but for us if we are to move on and away from the scarring. To not do so sentences us to a few extra suitcases of negatives that simply will continue to weigh us down. Those suitcases won’t go away until we literally drop them, and the best way to drop them is at God’s feet.

Finally, what possible good are we unless we, while recognizing all of this about ourselves, fail to recognize it about those others in our lives? With those, just as with ourselves (and as I have had to be with Kelly), it is incumbent, and in keeping with what God would have us to do, for us to be patient, understanding, kind anyway, empathic, tolerant, and loving. It’s not always easy, but it’s much better than being The Mean Man reincarnated in you.