Big Stuff

           I grew up in the era where dads didn't show emotion very much.  I suppose that came from the generation that preceded them.  It was kind of sad, as I came to realize later--and I say later because when you grow up in certain atmospheres what is there is "normal."  Perhaps that is why I don't remember very much about my early childhood.  It has never seemed to be "a special time" to me, or, a particularly happy time.  It was just time while I waited to get older.  Perhaps that is why I carefully planned and executed my escape at a very early age (probably around 10 or so).  I ran away after carefully packing my knapsack with food provisions, matches for a campfire, and some extra clothes.  That lasted a full day before the dog (me) came home with the tail tucked between the legs.  Running away, I came to realize, didn't really change all that much at home afterward.  I still felt pretty darn insignificant.

           Unfortunately, the characteristics of my father didn't escape me.  I was the same way with my kids.  I hadn't learned how the "be the kid" from my dad, so I wasn't very good at "being the kid" with my kids until they got closer to adulthood (teens). 

           The truth is, many of us adult fathers tend always not only to think like adults when around our kids, but to a large degree we tend to forget that our kids are just kids, that they think like kids, act like kids, and don't think like adults--though so often we somehow expect them to.  We often fail miserably to bring ourselves down to their level when we need to.  To them, their "stuff" is big stuff, really, really big deals.  To us it may often seem petty and trite, and is easily dismissed as such.  The following pretty much sums it up:

 

 

 

Bottom Line Thought:  Do you struggle with "being the kid" around your kids?  What impact do you think that might have on them as they grow up, and on how they parent in their time?  Are you doing all you can so that your kid can fully live with their "big stuff"?